The Fear Of Unfilled Potential

This blog is about the most frustrating aspect of my role, and I promise it will surprise you.

If I were to ask you to think about the answer, I'm sure you'd have said something along the lines of; the difficult cases, the clash of personalities, the long demanding hours, working with people, the never ending learning etc.  

But the actual answer is the frustration I feel when a client denies themselves, and therefore everyone they interact with, the happiness and success that comes with fulfilling one's true potential.

Now I tried to choose my words carefully during that description as I wanted to properly explain the reason for the frustration. For that reason I tried to split the statement up into 3 sections.  

For me everybody has the option of fulfilling their true potential. Now I couldn't care less if that potential is more, less or the same as mine or anybody else’s, as it’s that individual's potential. Nobody else’s.  

By not fulfilling their own potential they are denying themselves endless amounts of happiness, joy and satisfaction. If they want to deny themselves of that, it's their choice to do so. 

But not only does that affect the individual themselves, but that of every person they interact with. Mostly that would be in the form of family, friends, loved ones and colleagues. 

By being a lesser version of themself this means every person they interact with gets a lesser version of themself also. 

In essence, the better version of me I am. The better version of me, my partner gets, my parents get, my clients get and my friends get. That's 100’s of people who benefit from me being a better version of myself. 

And the most frustrating part of this for me, is that largely it's in our control. Now I know we can’t stop things from happening to us. But by taking accountability of the things we can control we can start to express our true potential. 

So why do I feel people don’t fulfill their potential?

Because it’s bloody uncomfortable and demands change.

These are 2 facets that most people actively avoid, being uncomfortable and making change.

Choosing to be more uncomfortable is irrasional. 

Which is why most people live in their comfort zones. Unfortunately our comfort zones are where growth and development go to die. 

The fear of change, is a fear of the unknown. Even if that change on the surface may be for the better. 

Why do people with 20 years of back pain choose to stay as they are, even when a solution is provided to them.

Because to change what they have known for 20 years must be bloody scary. For multiple reasons. It’s scary because they don't know how differently they’ll feel, think or act, and scary because that’ll mean for the last 20 years there was a solution out there that they didn't look for. And I dare say, for most, that's the scarier part. 

Whereas our comfort zones are like a thick knit blanket around a fire on a sunday afternoon after a roast dinner with the family and a glass of wine. It is safe, predictable, comfortable, reliable and involves no adversity.